HEALING THE YONI 1
Today I will be approaching the series from a different angle because unlike part 1 and 2, part 3 includes my personal stories with regards to my own journey of healing my own yoni. (I will go back to the other educational vibrations later.)
Today I just want to step out of my goddess element and be human for a minute.
So just like the yoni carries life and also births it, she can also carry trauma in various ways. If this trauma is not healed and transformed back into its positive mystical form, this trauma is transported from generation to generation through imprints.
An imprint is the level of spiritual vibration of our souls or rather duplicate etheric bodies. It is measured through our birth imprints when we incarnate at birth (birth imprint) and when we die (death imprint)
The yoni being the conduit of life and a transmutational force between cosmic vibrations is central to this process. Thus yoni trauma is also associated with the seven chakra and I will explain this through one of the major forms of yoni trauma I have undergone.
Rape: I have survived and conquered rape more than once in my life but I can tell you for free that rape kills you from the inside.
The ROOT CHAKRA deals with our innate abilities to feel grounded, safe, secure in our bodies and establish connections with people.
This chakra is also physically linked to our genitalia hence it is directly affected by rape trauma. This chakra is also associated with our energetic inheritance from family. In the physical, we are rooted in the earth and DNA energy so energetically we are rooted in the earth's energy and also the energetic inheritance from family. I carry some childhood trauma because of the turmoil that went on in my life as a child so my root chakra was always vulnerable. This was exacerbated by traumatic sexual experiences later on in life and that is why I have always had serious trust issues with myself and even with other people.
Healing: I am learning to be more grounded and centered by re- rooting all these energies into a new foundation which brings me safety and comfort. One of those is my own little family. I also have the gift of gab and the gift of music. I find safety in my pen and in my music. 
The SACRAL CHAKRA is linked to our emotions, creativity, sensuality, sexuality and our ability to adapt to things. Victims of sexual trauma are experts at blocking out their own feelings while paying excess attention to other people's feelings because the root chakra is already exposed anyway. Feelings of shame, guilt and survivor's remorse also fall here. This is why I have found myself dealing with hypersexuality, feelings of sexual hate towards myself and towards others, withdrawal, letting people cross my boundaries, creative blockages and feelings of unworthiness.
Healing: first I have had to own my anger and then find ways of letting it all out. I am still working on this. In the past I did Tae Kwon Do for a time, I made a lot of angry music, I pushed away all sorts of people and then I started rewiring myself afresh from a point of solitude. Now I am all about the gospel of self love and self care. I am also clearer with my boundaries and I am practicing healthy selfishness. I have given so much to people so it is only fair that I now give my all to myself.
The NAVAL CHAKRA/ SOLAR PLEXUS CHAKRA is linked to our sense of identity, boundaries, personal power and the ability to function in the world. This sword cuts both ways in that I have found myself in patterns of addiction and abuse especially with regards to alcohol. On the other hand I have found myself being an exceptional intellectual and organizer courtesy of this same chakra. The only problem is that I became a workaholic, a control freak and a sucker for mental overdrive and work related escapism. This has never been sustainable because energy is not flowing from the root and sacral chakras to my solar plexus. This is also why I have always felt alone and in turmoil even when I really wasn't.
Healing: I am learning to LET GO. I am also learning to let the energies flow between my other chakral points to this one so that they can work together for good i.e reestablishing safety and the ability to filter things. This is very hard for me; even now. 
The HEART CHAKRA is related to our relationships with others so it goes without saying that my relationships were deeply affected. I have found myself in relationships with weak men because I was afraid that powerful men would abuse me like they did before and I would not be able to do anything about it. I have also found myself unable to let go of toxic relationships because I was afraid that people would say I was not good enough. Equality based relationships and being vulnerable have also never been my strongest suit. I have always wanted to be strong and to win.
Healing: I have to affirm myself all the time by reminding myself that I am enough. I deserve to be loved and to be given the things I sometimes give to those who do not even deserve me. I am now comfortable being on my own when need be because the self love and self care I am giving myself is sufficient. I have evolved to a point where I do not settle for less than I deserve just because I felt unworthy due to the past violations directed at my person.
The THROAT CHAKRA is linked to our ability to communicate clearly, speak our truth and be authentic. The result is under expression or over expression and I have found myself grappling with both in different times after I was sexually traumatized. Writing has helped me work a lot through this and now I am able to say what I feel from my heart. Initially I would pretend to say one thing when I mean the other or be quiet altogether. I would mislead people as a elf defense mechanism because in hiding who I really was, they could not be able to hurt me. Nowadays I just speak my own truth and this is one of my biggest strengths all through my life.
The THIRD EYE CHAKRA and the CROWN chakra are not directly linked to sexual abuse. Still they can be linked to dissociative patterns such as mental or atral escapism and dysfunctional imaginations; the latter of which can catalyse addiction. I have found myself escape this world many times to avoid confronting my pain in a way that was not really creative or healthy. On the other hand, my over reliance to my naval chakra also made me fear the non intellectual chakras because I was afraid of the unknown.
Healing: to heal the 3rd eye and crown chakra I have had to first spend time balancing these other lower chakras in preparation for the goddess who now resides within me. To conquer the spiritual I have had to conquer the physical and I am still on that path. I am a daily work in progress but so far so good. I have come a long way and everyday I learn something new.
PS: I have seen some of these patterns in those who came before me and I am determined to break those patterns so that I do not carry them forward in future imprints. Once I heal my yoni as a woman, everything else falls into place because the yoni is a woman's Oracle; my Oracle. I must be in tune with it, listen to it, heal it and liberate it.
This was me speaking through my own example just so it was more understandable for survivors, for those who live with / around survivors and for the abominable souls who have caused such pain. However, I can tell you with certainty that this information can apply to you regardless of gender or if you have undergone sexual trauma or not.
Next we will talk about other forms of yoni trauma eg GBV, child loss, miscarriages etc and go deeper into the healing process. Feel free to share your own experiences or ask any questions so that we can learn together. As always I honour the power of the Devine Feminine. Ase!!! <3
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